You know you’re getting old, when Santa starts looking younger.

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I have just one question… Why in the hell is the term “It’s the thought that counts” an excuse when you didn’t think in the first place. For example: “I was ging to call you on your Birthday, I was just so busy but, it’s the thought that counts” or “I wanted to get you something for Christmas but just couldn’t decide on what would possibly bring a smile to your face, so I didn’t get anything but, it’s the thought that counts”… Seriously… If you really thought about doing something nice for someone, you would NEVER have to use that phrase, because it would have been done. Now, on the other hand if you DO do something nice for someone, and they don’t appreciate it well, then “It’s the thought that counts” and they are just ungrateful assholes.
 
It is 2:37am and I am supposed to be up in about an hour and a half, but I just can’t sleep. It’s Christmas day, and I have nothing planned, I am away from family, and the only thing that makes this different from any other day is I am off from work. I am thankful for this, because I thought I was going to sleep in, but in order to “Sleep In”, I have to go to sleep first. When I got off work earlier, I got straight on the bus, and went to KB’s job. KB is a friend of mine that I have known for about 4 years. We had worked together for the first two, and then I was transferred, it just so happens that she was supposed to be relocated to Korea with her job, but instead she came out here. Thank god for that. Anyway, I went to meet up with her, because her office was supposed to be having a Christmas party…. Well, it wasn’t really her office Christmas party, it was another office party that just so happened to request their space to have the event, so to be nice they were invited. I went not knowing this, and when I arrived I barely recognized anyone… since this was at KB’s office, you would think that her and her co-workers wouldn’t have to lift a hand, because after all, they were the ones that provided the space… this wasn’t the case. When I arrived it looked as though my guys were ushers, waiters, and cleaners for this party. Yes, they/we were invited to eat, but the whole time we felt funny, because we didn’t know anyone else, and we were all getting funny stares from the others. The food was okay, but I think if it would have been just us we would probably just be getting home from a night full of fun. That makes me sound ungrateful doesn’t it? Well, I’m not, I just don’t like when people are treated differently when they go out of their way to accomodate you. Does that make any sense?
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I think I will go to the movies later, AVATAR is playing and the commercials looked pretty good. I really like the graphics. I heard that it was supposed to be based off a cartoon, but I have never heard of that cartoon. I’m not a big fan of Cartoons anyway… with exception of South Park, King of the hill, and Family Guy.. pretty much the adult stuff. As far as that Japanimation & Kiddy toons go… I would rather read War & Peace. 3:02am … Still up…. Man, I should have taken some NyQuil, I’m sure that would have knocked me out…
  
6:20am I called my Aunt L, and I spoke to her very briefly… She is my Moms baby sister, I lived with her when I was little, she was always “That Girl” who I looked up to… We moved away when I was about 10, and her and my Mom stayed very close. It wasn’t until my Mom passed that I lost touch with anyone. I didn’t talk to ANYONE in my family for almost 7 years… I can’t explain why, but I think it’s because I didn’t have a steady job, and I was living from here to there, and I didn’t want them to see me like that. I wanted to establish a somewhat stable career, and life for myself before I showed my face again…Wow, I sure know how to get off subject…lol… Okay, so I called my Aunt L, and I wished her a Merry Christmas Eve, I told her I couldn’t talk long because I had to be up early, but that I would promise to call on Christmas morning… She always has a way of making me feel guilty even when she doesn’t try, but this wasn’t one of those times. She told me she loved me, and that I was really missed this year at Christmas, and how it just didn’t feel the same… it was right about this time that I had to cut it short, I could feel my voice cracking and tears swell in my eyes. I really miss her, and I wish I could be home for the Holidays. There has been so much that I have missed out on.Oh well, I always have next year.
 I talked to my Hubby, it didn’t go so well… we just can’t seem to get along, no matter the date, time or topic… I just wanna go home. I think that would make EVERYTHING a lot better.
“No one falls in love by choice, it is by CHANCE. No one stays in love by chance, it is by WORK. And no one falls out of love by chance, it is by CHOICE!!!”
 
I was off work today, and didn’t even spend it the way I had intended… As you already know I didn’t sleep at all throughout the night…  I finally fell asleep around 7am this morning, and was woke around 10. I got up, call the hubby, took a shower and went over to KB’s job. It was really cool, since there aren’t but 7 people in their office they all got each other something for Christmas, and the gifts were really thoughtful. They even included me… I knew me & KB were exchanging gifts, because we always do, but even her Boss got me something. That office is like every other office in the world, except one BIG difference… they really do care about each other, regardless if they complain, and get on each others nerves, they are good together. I feel so much more comfortable hanging out over there than I do in my own. So after KB got off at 3pm, we were heading to a BBQ, neither one of us had eaten since the night before at that Christmas party, and we were starving, so we stopped by subway first and split a meatball sub, it was soooooo good. well needless to say we weren’t that hungry when we got to the BBQ, and there were only 4 people there. Hmmm, I know we were a little late, but where was the music, the spades, the people? We hung around and chatted with everyone, and then the Z monster started to creep. I knew that I had a few things to do before I layed it down for the night, so I told KB that i was going to jet… She was going to leave also because we both work in the morning. so that was my day, I know, pretty boring especially for it being Christmas. We decided to not go see AVATAR tonight because this is the first showing so the theater is guaranteed to be packed, we will go later in the week when it’s not so crowded. I hope you all had a more productive day than I did. Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays to all..
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