When a girl marries, she exchanges the attention of many men for the inattention of one.

 I will be leaving for a little trip this week. It is a much-needed break from reality, better known as “7-Day work weeks“. I will be visiting the Persian Gulf. I have been there before, but I’m never one to give up any chance to travel. I will not be bringing my computer, therefore I won’t be able to update this site. I hope that I will come back, refreshed, with many new adventures to tell about. I will scribble down notes at the end of the day, and when I get back I will fill you all in.

The last time I talked to my Mr. P was on Saturday. I hung up on him, and don’t plan on speaking to him until I return from this trip. I have a lot to think about, and I don’t need him to try to influence my decisions. He may say that I’m “trippin'” or even that I’m “Crazy” but if refusing to settle for anymore bullsh*t is considered “trippin’ or crazy” then that’s exactly what I am. I don’t want him to tell me he is sorry, I want him to Man-up, and take care of his responsibilities. After 11 months of this behavior, I can pretty much call what I want a pipe dream. He is so comfortable the way things are that he has taken me for granted and doesn’t appreciate the life I have made for us.

I’ll be going back to the states in a little over a month, and the homecoming seems a little bitter-sweet. Mr. P and I are not on the best of terms, and as of now I can’t predict our future. If you have been reading past posts I might seem a little bi-polar (as he calls me), one day I will singing on the mountain tops and the next I will be plotting revenge.  I will be the first to admit it, my emotions are far from consistent, but every action has a reaction. I’ve learned I can only depend on ME.

 I love this man with all my heart, but I can’t bare to let him use me any longer. I have been lied to, I have been disrespected, and I have been ignored, none of which I deserve. There is only so much that a woman can take before she explodes. The battle between my heart and my brain will have to come to an end very soon. I know what I need to do, and I know what I want to do, either way the outcome will hurt.  Our one year anniversary is next month, and whoever said the first year of marriage is the easiest has never walked in my shoes. My trust in my husband has been shot, I can’t rely on him for much. The surprises that every woman loves so much is non-existent in this relationship. HONESTY and  MONEY are the two biggest disappointments I have been faced with, and honestly, if I didn’t have the little bit I do, I don’t think that he would still be around. I have asked for the bare minimum and in turn have received even less than that. Some might think that I have low self-esteem, or I depend on a man, that’s NOT at all the case. I have made it this far in a semi-succesful blue-collar job, I have everything I have because of ME. NOT a man. NOT once have I ever expected or insisted on a man buying my affection. Under NO circumstances do I have one gold-digging bone in my body. I was under the impression that if I could share my wealth with someone I love they would return the favor. When I say that, I’m not meaning go out and spend a million dollars on me, but treat me like I’m worth that much. The never-ending arguments have had a horrible effect on my health and my heart. He may not initiate the conversation that triggers these arguments but his actions have been the topic of discussion when all hell breaks loose. I am a good woman, I am great wife, and I spoil those I love even when they don’t deserve it.

“Treat others the way you want to be treated”  – That phrase has always stuck in my head, and the 33 years that I have been alive, I have yet to find my match when it comes to treating people in such a manner. I never expected to be married to my highschool sweetheart, and I never expected to give up every ounce of dignity I had in order to make his life better.  I would like to know what in the world I have done in my life to deserve to be treated like just another jump-off. I’m no ones fool, and I know that there has been many things go down back at home involving my husband that he will take to his grave. Some things are better left unsaid, but I would rather hear the facts from him instead of reading them or hearing them from someone else. If love and nurturing don’t come natural for people, who am I to force those feelings? I have no right to demand someones love and respect, but I have every right to receive it.

A Man Is A Luxury – Not A Necessity 

I do not need
A _ _ _ _ing man
I’ll get one later
If I can.

I do not need
A man at all
I do not need one,
Short or tall.

Not in a house,
Not in a van,
I do not need
A _ _ _ _ing man.

Not on the couch
Not in my bed
I’d rather sleep
Alone instead.

I do not need
One here or there
I do not need
One anywhere.

I do not need
A_ _ _ _ing man
There must be
A better plan.

Not one at work
Not one at play
I do not need one
Night or day.

I’ve said it once
I’ve said it twice
A world without them
Could be nice.

Black men, white men,
Men in blue
I am through with
All of you.

Even though they
Make me drool
I’m not a fan of
The dating pool.

I would not could not
Be a fool
Even for the
Biggest tool.

Now thanks to
My new vibrator
You _ _ _ _ing man
I’ll see you later.

I’ll try my hardest
Not to care
Even if he stands
There bare!!

My Horoscope for Today:

Ready for some deep thought? Seek out like-minded people for tag-team introspection. Financial obligations are weighing on you, but they are totally manageable. You should be able to get your creditors to relax or give you extra time — or even find a new way to make payments.

At the moment, you most value cooperation, compromise, balance and harmony — but none of those things will be especially easy to pull off if you’re not in the right company. You can certainly call upon your talents and assist others in smoothing things over, but don’t feel obligated to put yourself in the line of fire to do it. If you really want to help, you can only get so involved. 

10 Ways To Avoid A Lover’s Spat

 How many times have we started a conversation off with a “I don’t want to argue with you,” and then it turns into a knock down drag out? While fighting with your significant other is a given, it’s also necessary for a relationship to grow – or par for the course, right? But some, if not most, arguments are useless and can be avoided. Going to bed angry with your spouse or loved one is the worst and further propels the anger when you wake up the next morning not having resolved the issue. Why go to work piping hot and one irked nerve away from boiling over when you can talk it out? How long do the silent treatments have to last? Surely, this is no way to get your point across so why not stop adding fuel, and fight fire with water?

That’s the beauty of communication. What’s even more beautiful is knowing how to stop a tiff before it starts, regardless of the severity of the issue. At the end of the day, beefin’ with your boo is trivial since tomorrow is promised to no one and that’s why it’s so important to part ways for the day in peace. Take a look at these tips to avoid the loathsome lover’s spat!

1.) Soften Your Approach – who hates that already aggressive toned “we need to talk.” Ugh. The other person is already gearing up for battle … not a good starting point. Pose a question, “hey babe, can we talk?” Or, “I’ve got a few things I’ve been wanting to talk to you about, you got a minute?” This is setting the stage for equal engagement and the likelihood of getting a productive response is greater.

2.) Don’t Devalue – patience is key! When you’re pouring your heart out, expressing your feelings or stating your position, the last thing you want to hear is, “that is SO stupid,” or “what you’re saying makes NO sense,” or “what are you talking about?” Phrases like these make for an immediate shut down. Never make your loved one feel as though their thoughts and feelings are trivial and invalid. Try this instead, “help me understand where you’re coming from,” or “please explain further.” Yea, it’s like pulling teeth, but you want your loved one to feel comfortable expressing themselves to you. Again, patience.

3.) Take a Breather – in the heat of the moment it is so easy to be combative, fly off at the mouth and say mean-spirited things you don’t mean. It’s okay to have a problem and it’s okay to let it be known, but hollering with your arms folded, eye-rolling and not letting your partner get a word in edgewise is not communicating! It’s a turn off … a COMPLETE turn off. Back off and breath for a few, let your loved one know, “I’m hot right now. Give me moment to collect my thoughts.” What you’re displaying without saying it is, “I don’t want to fight.”

4.) Listen – when your partner says, “can I finish? Will you let me finish please?” This is no bueno. Let your lady/man speak his/her mind. Who cares how long it takes! Allow the venting process to take place and perhaps when he/she is finished you won’t have to say much at all. Listening to your partner is just as much a part of the communication process as speaking. Sometimes just hearing him/her out is all it takes to quell a dispute.

5.) Drop the Defense –Team “US” is ideal but when there’s a dispute, there are two teams: Team Me and Team You. The both of you cannot be in defense mode if you want resolution. Somebody has to play offense. Somebody has to be “the bigger person.” It’s easy to react and take part in the emotional whirlwind that suddenly came sweeping through the room, what sense does it make to go a-whirling with it? Try for this in a soothing tone “hey, whoa! Baby, calm down. Relax, have a seat. Let’s talk about this.”

6.) Find the Root of the Problem – the fact that you left your socks in the middle of the floor or forgot to flush the toilet is not the real reason that you’re in the throws of a battle. Get to the root of the issue by refusing to participate in the trivial bickering. It’s not the socks or the gift in the toilet that’s got him/her on tilt! Ask your partner or yourself, “what’s the real problem?” “Is there a deeper issue that needs to be confronted?” Once you figure it out, apply the measures listed above.

7.) Agree to Disagree Respectfully – in a perfect world we would see eye to eye all the time, but we all know that’s not the case. Instead of approaching the situation expecting compliance, just shoot for understanding. You simply cannot convince someone to see it your way. It’s okay to disagree, explain why you do and find a happy medium. You can save yourself the exhaustion by looking for ways to work together to reach a hub of solid communication. After a while it becomes effortless.

8.) Take Ownership – if you’re wrong, admit it. Don’t blame your partner or his or her actions for your behaving like a child or being irrational and immature. “I did that because you do xyz.” Why do we have to duck and dodge the B.S. BEFORE addressing the real issue? Be responsible and say, ” hey, you know what? I was wrong for that. This is why I did it. I understand why you’re mad right now. I’m listening.” If it’s warranted, take that verbal lashing! If you F’d up, you F’d up! And now, by default, you have to listen to your lady/man fuss about it. It happens to the best of us, we all have to sit in the hot seat from time to time. It’s okay.

9.) Ask Questions – a good Q & A can be really helpful and eye-opening. Ask simple and candid questions. As corny as it sounds ask your partner, “how did that make you feel?” “Why are you crying?” “What can I do to help us move past this?” This will give him/her a chance to verbalize specific needs and wants and it gives you a chance to make it clear how you plan to deliver.

10.) Sex – self-explanatory. Nothing like some good lovin’ to quiet a storm in the making. But here’s the deal, just because you had a good session doesn’t mean the problem is fixed! Sex is just a leeway to better communication! Sex is a stress reliever and once you’ve relieved some tension, talking things out is all but effortless! (BOSSIP)

More Facebook Fails…

Everybody should know by now to be careful what you post on your Facebook page (or any of your social media profiles). And yet, it seems like a new story comes out every week about somebody getting fired, suspended or embarrassed because of what they’ve posted.

Lets be  a lil smarter and wiser than these folks.

Top 10 Most Evil Women

We all tend to focus on the evil men in the world and forget some of the truly evil women that have lived. I hope to correct that with this list. Here we have not just serial killers, but other utterly despicable women who have caused tragedy in many people’s lives. So, without further ado, here are the top 10 most evil women in history.

10. Queen Mary I Born: 1516; Died: 1558

Mary was the only child of Henry VIII and Catherine of Aragon to live past infancy. Crowned after the death of Edward VI and the removal of The Nine Days Queen-Lady Jane Grey, Mary is chiefly remembered for temporarily and violently returning England to Catholicism. Many prominent Protestants were executed for their beliefs leading to the moniker “Bloody Mary”. Fearing the gallows a further 800 Protestants left the country, unable to return until her death. It should be noted that Elizabeth I shares position 10 on this list for her equally bad behavior.

9. Myra Hindley Born: 1942; Died: 2002

Myra Hindley and Ian Brady were responsible for the “Moors murders” occurring in the Manchester area of Britain in the mid 1960’s. Together these two monsters were responsible for the kidnapping, sexual abuse, torture and murder of three children under the age of twelve and two teenagers, aged 16 and 17. A key found in Myra’s possession led to incriminating evidence stored at a left-luggage depot at Manchester Central Station. The evidence included a tape recording of one of the murder victims screaming as Hindley and Brady raped and tortured her. In the final days before incarceration, she developed a swagger and arrogant attitude that became her trademark. Police secretary Sandra Wilkinson has never forgotten seeing Hindley and her mother Nellie, leaning against the courthouse eating sweets. While the mother was obviously and understandably upset, Hindley seemed indifferent and uncaring of her situation.

8. Isabella of Castile Born: 1451; Died: 1504

Isabella I of Spain, well-known as the patron of Christopher Columbus, with her husband Ferdinand II of Aragon, are responsible for making possible the unification of Spain under their grandson Carlos I. As part of the drive for unification, Isabella appointed Tomás de Torquemada as the first Inquisitor General of the inquisition. March 31, 1492 marks the implementation of the Alhambra Decree; expulsion edicts forcing the removal or conversion of Jews and Muslims. Roughly 200,000 people left Spain; those remaining who chose conversion were subsequently persecuted by the inquisition investigating Judaizing conversos. In 1974, Pope Paul VI opened her cause for beatification. This places her on the path toward possible sainthood. In the Catholic Church, she is thus titled Servant of God.

7. Beverly Allitt Born: 1968

The “Angel of Death, Beverley Gail Allit, is one of Britain’s most well-known serial killers. Working as a pediatric nurse, she is responsible for the murder of 4 children and the serious injury of 5 others in her care. When available, insulin or potassium injections were used to precipitate cardiac arrest; smothering sufficed when they were not. Although convicted with death or injury in nine cases, Allit attacked thirteen children over a fifty-eight day period before being caught red-handed. Allit has never spoken of the motive for her crimes, but Munchausen’s Syndrome by Proxy explains her actions. This debatable personality disorder involves a pattern of abuse or harm to someone in your care in order to garner attention (Alitt was known as a child to wear bandages and casts over wounds, but would not allow them to be examined).

6. Belle Gunness Born: 1859; Died: 1931

Belle Gunness was one of America’s most degenerate and productive female serial killers. Standing 6 ft (1.83 m) tall and weighing in at over 200 lbs (91 kg), she was an imposing and powerful woman of Norwegian descent. It is likely that she killed both her husbands and all of her children at different times, but it is certain that she murdered most of her suitors, boyfriends, and her two daughters, Myrtle and Lucy. The motive was greed-pure and simple; life insurance policies and assets stolen or swindled from her suitors became her source of income. Most reports put her death toll at more than twenty victims over several decades, with some claiming in excess of one hundred. Inconsistencies during her post-mortem examination; the corpse was reported to be two inches shorter than Belle’s six feet, paved the way for Belle Gunnes to enter American criminal folklore, a female Bluebeard.

5. Mary Ann Cotton Born: 1832; Died: 1873

Englishwoman Mary Ann Cotton is another for-profit serial killer, predating Belle Gunnes by thirty years. Married at age twenty to William Mowbray, the newlyweds settled in Plymouth, Devon, to start their family. The couple had five children, four of whom died of ‘gastric fever and stomach pains’. Moving back to the north-east, tragedy seemed to follow them; three more children born, three more children died. William soon followed his offspring, dying of an ‘intestinal disorder’ in January 1865. British Prudential promptly paid a 35 pound dividend, and a pattern was established. Her second husband, George Ward, died of intestinal problems as well as one of her two remaining children. The power of the press, always a force to be reckoned with, caught up with Mary Ann. The local newspapers discovered that as Mary Ann moved around northern England, she lost three husbands, a lover, a friend, her mother and a dozen children, all dying of stomach fever. She was hanged at Durham County Gaol, March 24, 1873, for murder by arsenic poisoning. She died slowly, the hangman using too short a drop for a ‘clean’ execution.

4. Ilse Koch Born: 1906; Died: 1967

“Die Hexe von Buchenwald” the Witch of Buchenwald, or “Buchenwälder Schlampe” the Bitch of Buchenwald was the wife of Karl Koch, commandant of the concentration camps Buchenwald from 1937 to 1941, and Majdanek from 1941 to 1943. Drunk on the absolute power rendered by her husband, she reveled in torture and obscenity. Infamous for her souvenirs; tattoos taken from the murdered inmates, her reputation for debauchery was well earned. After building an indoor sports arena in 1940, with 250,000 marks stolen from inmates, Ilsa was promoted to Oberaufseherin or “chief overseer” of the few female guards at Buchenwald. She committed suicide by hanging herself at Aichach women’s prison on September 1, 1967.

3. Irma Grese Born: 1923; Died: 1945

Another product of the Nazi’s final solution, Irma Grese or the “Bitch of Belsen” was a guard at concentration camps Ravensbrück, Auschwitz and Bergen-Belsen. Transferred to Auschwitz in 1943, (she must have shown particular enthusiasm and dedication to the job), she was promoted to Senior Supervisor, the 2nd highest ranking female in camp, by the end of the year. In charge of over 30,000 Jewish female prisoners, she reveled in her work. Her work included; savaging of prisoners by her trained and half-starved dogs, sexual excesses, arbitrary shootings, sadistic beatings with a plaited whip, and selecting prisoners for the gas chamber. She enjoyed both physical and emotional torture and habitually wore heavy boots and carried a pistol to facilitate both.

2. Katherine Knight Born: 1956

The first Australian woman to be sentenced to a natural life term without parole, Katherine Knight had a history of violence in relationships. She mashed the dentures of one of her ex-husbands and slashed the throat of another husband’s eight-week-old puppy before his eyes. A heated relationship with John Charles Thomas Price became public knowledge with an Apprehended Violence Order that Price had filed against Knight and ended with Knight stabbing Price to death with a butcher’s knife. He had been stabbed at least 37 times, both front and back, with many of the wounds penetrating vital organs. She then skinned him and hung his “suit” from the door frame in the living room, cut off his head and put it in the soup pot, baked his buttocks, and prepared gravy and vegetables to accompany the ‘roast’. The meal and a vindictive note were set out for the children, luckily discovered by police before they arrived home.

1. Elizabeth Bathory Born: 1560; Died: 1614

Countess Elizabeth Bathory is considered the most infamous serial killer in Hungarian/Slovak history. Rumors had circulated for years about missing peasant girls; offered well paid work at the castle, they were never seen again. One of these rumors reached the ears of King Mathias II, who sent a party of men to the massive Castle Csejthe. The men found one girl dead and one dying. Another was found wounded and others locked up. Described atrocities, collected from testimony of witnesses, include; severe beatings over extended periods of time, the use of needles, burning or mutilation of hands, sometimes also of faces and genitalia, biting the flesh off the faces, arms and other bodily parts, and the starving of victims. The victim total is thought to number in the hundreds occurring over a twenty-five year period. Due to her social status she was never brought to trial but remained under house arrest in a single room until her death. The idea that the Countess bathed in the blood of her victims is folklore, and one of the few things she did not do. (Source)

Note: In order to clear one point up, Lizzie Borden is not on this list because she was found innocent of the murder of her parents.

5 Strange Ways Wives have Killed Their Husbands

Getting out of a marriage can be as simple as filing for divorce or it can be as creative as those who didn’t only want to stand by their man, but they also didn’t want to leave their man standing.

1. Agrippina’s Story

Claudius the fourth Roman Emperor also known as Tiberius Claudius Caesar Augustus Germanicus was in the midst of big marriage problems with wife number five Agrippina. He was heard publicly to complain about his bad luck in marrying so many disagreeable women. This might have spurred Agrippina into action not so much out of a need for vengeance as a fear from losing out on the position. She saw herself and her son trying to occupy when Claudius was out of the picture. He was also making statements regarding reconciliation with son Britannicus which would have knocked Agrippina’s son Nero out of the running for ruler of Rome. She needed her husband out-of-the-way, but it couldn’t have been just logic that drove her since the poison, that was administered to him, was slow and painful. When it seemed the old man wouldn’t die quickly enough Agrippina sent in a slave with a feather to induce vomiting, claiming it would cure him. Of course, vomiting might in fact have helped Claudius if the feather hadn’t been dipped in yet more poison.

2. Ruth Snyder

In 1925 Ruth Snyder a housewife from Queens New York decided to have her husband killed by his would-be replacement, her boyfriend, Henry Judd Gray, a corset salesman. Together the pair planned her husband’s, Albert’s death, but not before Ruth talked her husband into signing a life insurance policy that would pay off extra if he were attacked and died by an act of violence. Ruth and Henry, neither of whom were exactly well read, tried various methods of disposing of poor Albert, but finally gave up when he began to become difficult to handle. The couple garroted Albert and when they failed to kill him quickly enough they stuffed rags soaked in chloroform up his nose. After Albert died in agonizing death, the couple tried to make the place seem as if it had been broken into, but the cops didn’t buy it. Cornered, the pair told on one another and both received the death penalty. Ruth Snyder was among few women to have ever been put on the death by electrocution, a far more merciful death than Albert Snyder experienced.

3. Pamela Smart

Like Ruth the pretty 23 year-old Pamela Smart tried to use her boyfriend to kill her husband. Her boyfriend and lover was only 15 at the time, but he, along with an accomplice, managed to surprise and shoot Gregory Smart as he entered his own home. Police might not have pieced together the entire murder plot if Pamela hadn’t made the mistake of forgetting that teens are notoriously bad at keeping secrets. She’s currently serving time for taking part in the murder scheme.

4. Larissa Schuster

Larissa Schuster had a boyfriend too, but being a biochemist she also had her own chemical lab. This was a bad combination for her husband Timothy, who was fighting her tooth and nail in their divorce. In 2003 the 47-year-old Larissa had enough so she rented a storage unit. She and her boyfriend then kidnapped the luckless Timothy using a stun gun and chloroform to subdue him. While barely conscious, he was still very much alive but incapacitated so they stuffed his body into a barrel. Then Larissa began pouring the hydrochloric acid into the container. When the police found Timothy Schuster, all that was left of him was the lower part of his body from the belt buckle down. Larissa got sentenced to a life in prison for her heinous crime.

5. Clara Harris

 Clara Harris didn’t have a boyfriend, but she was sure her husband had a girlfriend. She hired a private detective and not only did he confirm her worst fear,  he invited her down to a hotel her husband, David Harris, was using for the affair. This turned into a fatal confrontation and when David headed toward his girlfriend’s car Clara snapped. She got behind the wheel of her Mercedes and ran over her husband. Then she followed the curve of the drive and hit him again as he lay on the ground. She tried to tell police that her foot had slipped and she’d lost control of the car, but the couple’s daughter who’d also been in the vehicle with her mother testified against her. Clara is serving life in prison for running over her man.(WORM)

Lesbian Discharged From Military After Police Tell Her Orientation

Jene Newsome, an Air Force sergeant who kept her sexual orientation private and the American Civil Liberties Union claim South Dakota police officers violated her privacy by “outing” her to the military.

The 28-year-old’s honorable discharge under the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy came only after police officers in Rapid City, S.D., saw an Iowa marriage certificate in her home and told the nearby Ellsworth Air Force Base.

Newsome and the ACLU filed a complaint against the western South Dakota police department, claiming the officers violated her privacy when they informed the military about her sexual orientation. The case also highlights concerns over the ability of third parties to “out” service members, especially as the Pentagon has started reviewing the 1993 “don’t ask, don’t tell” law.

“I played by ‘don’t ask, don’t tell,'” Newsome told The Associated Press by telephone.

“I just don’t agree with what the Rapid City police department did. … They violated a lot of internal policies on their end, and I feel like my privacy was violated.”

The “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy has come under renewed debate after Defense Secretary Robert Gates called for a sweeping internal study on the law earlier this year.

As the review is under way, officials were also expected to suggest ways to relax enforcement that may include minimizing cases of third-party outings. In particular, Gates has suggested that the military might not have to expel someone whose sexual orientation was revealed by a third-party out of vindictiveness or suspect motives.

The Rapid City Police Department says Newsome, an aircraft armament system craftsman who spent nine years in the Air Force, was not cooperative when they showed up at her home in November with an arrest warrant for her partner, who was wanted on theft charges in Fairbanks, Alaska.

Newsome was at work at the base at the time and refused to immediately come home and assist the officers in finding her partner, whom she married in Iowa — where gay marriage is legal — in October.

Police officers, who said they spotted the marriage license on the kitchen table through a window of Newsome’s home, alerted the base, police Chief Steve Allender said in a statement sent to the AP. The license was relevant to the investigation because it showed both the relationship and residency of the two women, he said. (Source)

The truth about women…

It has come to my attention that most men don’t know sh*t  about women and why we do the things that we do. Here is a little of what you SHOULD know.  

1). EVERY woman hates to be spoken to in a manner that makes them think that YOU think they are stupid. Women go their whole lives with the world treating them like they aren’t as smart as men. DON’T think they are going to take that sh*t at home or in their relationship. Women are NOT stupid. They just give you the benefit of the doubt. Even when they should doubt your benefits.

2). Dude, NOT saying sh*t is the same as lying when it comes to women. Nothing will make a woman want to stab you in the face more than you trying some technicality sh*t on them. Go on and say some sh*t like: ” Well I didn’t lie exactly… I just didn’t bring it up.” You will get stabbed in the face.

3). God made Lilith and she wouldn’t obey him. God made Eve, and SHE didn’t obey him. So if the creator of the universe itself can’t get women to listen to what he had to say, what the fugg makes you think YOU have a chance.

4). Chances are your woman is not a crazy b*tch. She has the ability to BE a crazy b*tch, but she keeps it on a leash. But if you give her a reason to, she’ll take crazy b*tch off the leash and sick her on your ass. When your woman truly loves you, she doesn’t want to be a crazy b*tch towards you. Chances are YOU brought that ish out of her by breaking the primary rule…. talking to her like she was stupid. Get shot in the face if ya want to.

5). When a woman says she wants a nice, sweet and sensitive man, she is a LIAR. She will say that she wants a man like that, but the dude she is going to crave is the one that gives her flowers along with an “OOOOOHHH” face and issues.  So when they start talking that boolsh*t about wanting a Ralph Tresvant ass dude, ignore them.

6). For women great sex.. really fulfilling sex…knock their ass out the bed sex, is rare. So if you make a woman convulse till she damn near has an aneurysm, you can pretty much get away with whatever you want to.  Not for a long period of time mind you, because eventually her stankin’ ass friends are going to talk some sense into her. But for the short-term, if you make a woman “OOOOOOOHHHHH!!!!!” really well and consistently, You pretty much have the run of the land….until she stabs you in the face. Which she will do.

7). PLEASE know that women are more vicious than you could ever be. If you get busted cheating, PLEASE note that any man you know is fair game. A woman isn’t going to fugg some random dude to get back at you. Nooooo. She is going to fugg someone you know. Like your boy, your daddy, or that dude at work that you HATE. Yeah him. Imagine THAT dude in her mouth. Yup. Women are the masters at revenge. If you hurt them, they will hurt you 10 fold, homey.

8). To a woman, holding her purse means that you care enough about her happiness to forgo what other people think and ONLY worry about her desires. She knows you look like a fool. She knows you look like a b*tch. But if you are willing to look like all types of ish for her, that means a lot. And you’ll probably get your rewarded very well. *WINK*

9). Women have feelings. They express those feelings. They are NOT men and they aren’t supposed to act like it. Soooo telling a woman to man-up could get you stabbed in the face.

10). If a woman wants to cheat on you, face it dude. You’ll never find out. Women are the masters at cheating. MASTERS.

11). A woman’s coochie knows if it would fugg you when she meets you. But soon as you say something stupid, her head WILL kick in and halt all possibilities. It’s pretty much up to you to talk yourself into some ass. There have been many a pretty boy who has sat there wondering why they didn’t get to fugg someone. Chances are he talked TOO fuggin much about ish that wasn’t important.

12). Big d*ck and  diamonds. A woman will change her mind REALLY quick when faced with either of them.

13). The safer a woman feels around you, the quicker your ass will get in the friend zone. You want a woman to WANT you. She should not feel like she can just hang around you all the time and not find herself in a compromising position. If she feels like she might catch herself on all four at any moment around you and like it…. You’re in a good place. NOT the friend zone.

14). If your mom is a good mother, but she and your woman do not get along, it WILL NOT WORK. Just like in the Jungle the Lioness is the true ruler of the Pride and there are no two lionesses in charge within a kingdom. They yield to the highest Lioness or they die. It’s the same with you mother and woman.

15). If you know your mother not to be catty and has always looked out for you before, PLEASE trust her when she tells you that the woman you brought to meet her aint sh*t. Women can sniff a slick b*tch out post haste.

16). There is a difference between a Gold Digger and a woman who expects you to be financially sound. If you can’t get a bank account or a credit card, it’s not HER with the problem.

17). If your girlfriend will cosign or put a car in her name for YOU. You’ve found a dumb chick. And if dumb chicks are your thing, you have hit the jackpot. Because no woman with good sense would do this.

18). Women NEVER forget. EVERYTHING you have done wrong is cumulative. It adds up. Please know that the sh*t you did 5 years ago on May 5th, can still be held against you TODAY. (OHN)

16 Horrifying Female Bodybuilders

Female bodybuilders truly are an amazing species. They’re kinda like futuristic cyborg soldiers sent to Earth for one simple purpose… to scare the complete sh*t out of grown men, children and small animals. Nothing can stop them because everyone is far too frightened to stand anywhere near them and they’re probably the one thing capable of fixing our economy. I’m telling you, if we sent an army of fully trained female bodybuilders to Washington D.C., we could take over congress in a week.

Fella’s be careful what you wish for… I’m sure there was a man somewhere pressuring these woman to get into the gym, and pump weight with them… now look, they have created monsters. (Source)

The longest sentence you can form with two words is “I do.”

Here are some updated pictures of Sancho, and my Kitties:

The 1st picture shows Thing 1 cleaning Sancho, for some reason she is always giving him a bath, they share a bed, and are constantly playing. The the 2nd picture is all three of my kids… you see Thing 2? She is such a snob, she barely even acknowledges the other two. I guess thing 1 thought that we got her a playmate when Sancho came home. I’m sure glad they all get along. I miss them so much… Oh, and you too Daddy…

I know you all are probably asking…. ‘Where has she been”, Well, I’ve been really busy at work, preparing myself to go home. I think I have a little over a month to go, and I am more than ready. Mr. P and I have been discussing the possibility of getting custody of his little sister. She is in an enviroment that isn’t the best for her. I remember when I was 15, in highschool, and was on the search to find myself. I needed stability, I needed nurturing, and most of all, I needed attention. I didn’t receive any of that, and therefore I rebelled, that is what I want to try an avoid with her. Teenage girls will make mistakes, and hit a lot of brick walls on their road to discovery, but I want that road to be as smooth as it can if I can help it. I am excited, and I am ready to help he out in any way possible.

WOMEN’S REVENGE

‘Cash, check or charge?’ I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

‘So, do you always carry your TV remote?’ I asked.

‘No,’ she replied, ‘but my husband refused to come shopping with me, 

and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.’

Wanna see something funny?

Lol… This was my Hubby e-mailing me (so he thought), and questioning me (Himself).  He was out with the boys on this night, he came home, and he thought he was e-mailing me, but was actually sending himself e-mails…lol… I can’t help but laugh out loud, because he was getting really annoyed with me because he thought I was being bitchy and replying back to him with exactly what he had sent me.  After he told me what he had done, I e-mailed him, and said “It’s Because Your DRUNK”… As you can tell he once again replied to himself, and stated “I’m not drunk punk, I mean babe”… I guess I proved my point. He doesn’t get ‘Drunk” a lot, but I can guarantee a tipsy man at least twice a week. I’ll be the drunk one when I get back, I haven’t had a drop of anything in almost 6 months. We are not allowed to drink out here. They consider this a Dry Country. It’s illegal to have alcohol, kind of like weed in the U.S., people have it, or know how to find it, but you gotta be sneaky when partying. I think the 1st drink I’m gonna have is a Snake Bite – Southern Comfort on the rocks, with a splash of Ginger Ale, and a squeeze of real lime…. Mmmmmm..

My Horoscope for Today:

Other people are power sources. Get out there and socialize. It will rejuvenate you. Keep up the creative energy — you’ve got plenty to spare today! You may find a new way to get work done faster, or discover a new inspiration for your artistic drives. Don’t deny yourself!  To say that your companion for the day will be a bit erratic, impulsive and maybe even reckless, well, that won’t quite cover the enormity of the situation. Their behavior may, in fact, be so far off the wall that you’ll react in an equally unpredictable style — if you’re not careful. Desperate people do desperate things, while bored, rash people provoke impulsive actions. Don’t be roped in if you don’t want to be. Sit tight unless you’re actually craving some melodrama.

Awful People Who Got What Was Coming to Them

1. Carl ‘Alfalfa’ Switzer

Yes, that would be Alfalfa from the Little Rascals. Turns out, off-key singing and bad hair were not his only crimes against humanity.

As a kid, he was little bastard, pulling pranks on other little rascals cast members; He once put fishing hooks in Spanky’s pants, resulting in cuts so bad that poor Spanky needed stitches. He convinced Darla to put her hand in his pocket, telling her he had a ring in it for her. Take a guess as to what it was. Did you think “his penis”? I did too. Nope, Alfalfa wasn’t a pervert, he was a sick asshole. It was switch blade, and Darla nearly lost a finger because of it. When The Little Rascals series was sold to MGM, he got even worse. During a filming break, he pissed on the set’s lights. When they turned them back on, the smell made by super heated urine was so intense they had to stop filming for the day.

He didn’t die with his childhood, though. He got married, but that only lasted 4 months. He got shot while getting into his car once; they don’t know why, and while getting shot isn’t in and of itself a s***y thing, his track record suggests he didn’t buy the guy flowers and the dud just f****g snapped…

He also cut down 15 trees in Sequoia National Park. About national parks, they say “Take only pictures and leave only footprints.” Alfalfa said “F**k you, I’m taking 15 trees”.

In 1959, Alfalfa got drunk and decided that a guy he knew named Bud Stiltz owed him 50 bucks. Apparently, Alfalfa borrowed a dog from the guy, then lost it. He paid the Bud $35 and bought him $15 worth of drinks at a bar, to make up for it, but guess what? They found the dog. So he decided Bud owed him the 50 he had paid him. Never mind the whole ordeal was his fault, and it’s a pretty bulls**t move to buy someone drinks, THEN tell them they owe you for it. A scuffle ensued, wherein Alfalfa and his friend beat up Bud, who took a glass dome clock to the head, leading him to get his gun. Alfalfa grabbed the gun, which he almost got away from the guy (which is a bad-ass check in Alfalfa’s book) , and forced Bud back into a closet (check number 2), but when he pulled a switch blade (we don’t know if this is the same one he used to carve off Darla’s finger) and told Bud he was going to kill him, Bud apparently had enough and shot him. In the groin.

No doubt, Spanky got some cosmic joy out of the whole thing, because Alfalfa died of internal bleeding from a nut-shot on the way to the hospital.

 

 

2. Jeffery Dahmer

This one is pretty well-known, but for the three of you that don’t know who he is:

Jeffery Dahmer is most famous for being the guy who killed and ate 17 people in the early 90s. He trolled bars, looking to pick up guys and take them home, where he would drug them, screw them, kill them, screw them some more, then eat them. One can assume that with that track record, he probably then screwed them some more.

But he didn’t just grow up to be an asshole; like Alfalfa, he was a di*k early on, too. As a kid he would kill and dissect animals. He stuck a dog head on a stick out in the woods in a very Lord of the Flies fashion for anyone who happened by.

He was a chronic alcoholic by the time he was a teenager, tough that isn’t in and of itself an asshole move, but it’s a pretty good indicator. He was forced to enlist in the army by his dad, but they didn’t want him because he drank too much so he was kicked out after 2 years.

Then for a while he busied himself with showing his junk to kids and trying to fondle them, which resulted in some jail time. When that wasn’t enough, he began killing and eating people.

In some cases, he tried drilling holes in their heads while they were still alive and poured acid in the holes to try to make them zombie love slaves. But damn it all if they didn’t just keep dying. So he ate them. Apparently, he was lonely. That was the root of it all; he couldn’t relate to people, and kids wouldn’t let him feel them up, so he decided the best way to maintain a relationship would be to lobotomize people so they would presumably have a hard time finding the door.

Since being a “Drunk ex-army guy” didn’t qualify him to perform medical procedures on people, and he wound up killing all of them, he just decided to eat them so they would always be a part of him. Imagine the heartbreak every time he took a dump.

Most of his victims were grown men that should have taken one look at his mustache and told him to f**k off, but in one case he killed a 14-year-old kid, who happened to be the younger brother of one of the kids he’d felt up. All told, he’d killed 17 people, and the cops found partial bodies, heads, and skulls in the closet, as well as 3 penises in the fridge. He was eventually caught, and imprisoned, where there were some attempts made to kill him.

A guy named Jesse Anderson apparently decided that attempting to kill Jeff wasn’t good enough. Showing the kind of gusto that makes people say “If you want something done well, do it yourself”, he took the bar from a weight machine and proceeded to show Jeffery Dahmer that if he swung hard enough, he could hit the floor with it, despite Jeff’s head being in the way. We don’t know if they actually discussed this point, but he proved it anyway. Jeff died on the way to the hospital.

3. Elizabeth Bathory

Men aren’t the only people in the world sick enough to actually deserve an awful end. Anyone who has ever played Vampire: The Masquerade or has googled “female serial killer” has probably heard of Countess Bathory. She was a noble in Eastern Europe in the 16th century. She actually started off pretty normal for a noble of the time. She was well-educated, was married to a powerful man, and had several kids.

She helped several women during the wars being fought with the Ottoman empire, even helping out a peasant woman and her daughter who had been raped and impregnated.

After her husband died in 1604 (they had been married for 29 years), rumors started to fly about some shady goings-on at Bathory’s place; namely that she hired peasant girls to work for kick-ass rates and then murdered them, bled them, and bathed in their blood. Apparently simply killing and draining them was not enough; they had to be tortured and starved first. Since there are no legends that torture blood is more effective at keeping you young than just any old blood, I can only assume that in addition to being evil, Bathory was just a bit*h.

In all she was rumored to have killed over 600 girls from the 17 surrounding villages. The general lack of milk cartons at the time probably made it easy for Bathory, since it was unlikely that all of the villages were going to get together one day and in conversation say “Wait, all of your daughters are disappearing, too?”

6 years later, she was officially arrested along with 4 servants who had helped her. Supposedly, all the bleeding and bathing was done in an attempt to remain youthful forever, and possibly to see if Bath and Body Works products could cover the scent of death. (They couldn’t)

The 4 servants were immediately put to death (they were all found guilty, though, so don’t feel bad), and the countess herself was walled up in her basement as her punishment. She lasted 4 years, presumably bathing in her own waste by then. (Source)